27 October 2008
27 April 2008
Calgary Police Service Marathon
At 0800hrs this morning the race started. I was racing in the CPS Marathon. It was amazing, I had so much fun. My time wasn't the best time, but I finished the marathon.
This marathon has inspired me to set these goals:
This marathon has inspired me to set these goals:
- Train more on my bike, in the pool, and as a runner.
- Start running tri's.
- Eventually qualify for the Boston Marathon.
- Eventually qualify for a few Ironman competitions.
Many thanks go out to JR, for inspiring me to run. I've got a tonne of respect for him, and he's the reason I ran the marathon today. Furthermore, he's inspiring me to get involved in the Tri scene. Thanks budd! This is amazing, I'm glad you introduced me to it.
As for now, I'm off to bed. I'm getting some well deserved rest - after a marathon and a football practice.
16 April 2008
Million Miles An Hour
My mind is going a million miles an hour right now. I mean, I'm really starting to see things I have missed. I've really found an appreciation for life. I guess, you could say I am happy.
I'm sitting here working my butt off on school stuff, and chatting with people on MSN. Today, I finally found the last piece of the puzzle, and figured out that a friend from Jr. High is getting married. She invited me to her wedding. Wow.
Last week I found a new appreciation for friends, and for family. I spent the week with the most amazing, lovable people. Things started looking up after that. I got my self confidence back. I regained some of my self esteem. Today I found out Katrina is getting married.
I'm surrounded by a great group of mates, and they've helped me find my reasons to live, and to love. I don't quite understand why I ever was contemplating suicide... but I'm sure glad I'm still here.
The saying is true - Dream as if you'll live forever, and live as if you will die tomorrow. You never know what's around the corner. You don't know who'll save your life, but when you need people there, THEY ARE there. If you learn anything from this, let it be that you shouldn't ever give up. Life is to precious. You only live once, so have a fu**ing blast every day. Cheers!
I'm sitting here working my butt off on school stuff, and chatting with people on MSN. Today, I finally found the last piece of the puzzle, and figured out that a friend from Jr. High is getting married. She invited me to her wedding. Wow.
Last week I found a new appreciation for friends, and for family. I spent the week with the most amazing, lovable people. Things started looking up after that. I got my self confidence back. I regained some of my self esteem. Today I found out Katrina is getting married.
I'm surrounded by a great group of mates, and they've helped me find my reasons to live, and to love. I don't quite understand why I ever was contemplating suicide... but I'm sure glad I'm still here.
The saying is true - Dream as if you'll live forever, and live as if you will die tomorrow. You never know what's around the corner. You don't know who'll save your life, but when you need people there, THEY ARE there. If you learn anything from this, let it be that you shouldn't ever give up. Life is to precious. You only live once, so have a fu**ing blast every day. Cheers!
14 April 2008
Nice to be home
Well, I never thought I'd be saying this - but it's nice to be home. Don't get me wrong, I miss everyone from last weeks camp so much. There will always be a few that are always near and dear to my heart... and I hope it remains that way. The only reason I am happy to be home is the food. The food at the camp was okay, but really bland and boring. It's nice to be able to be cooking again! Last night I had a pretty simple dinner ... just roasted potatoes & herbs, balsamic chicken and green beans. But it was nice to have properly seasoned food. My palate was quite appreciative of that. Lol.
Re-entry into school was hard today. The first word out of one of my friends mouths today was chink. Then, the more I listened the more of the derogatory words I started hearing. I didn't think Diefenbaker really had a problem - by words like "gay" and variations of "retard" are too common. It really sucks to hear, I find it relatively depressing. I was able to get together with my school group today (minus Sophie - rugby meeting, and Neil - just not there) and that was great. I missed hanging out with those guys. I missed hanging out with mature people who understood all the reasons why we shouldn't be using language like that.
Re-entry into school was hard today. The first word out of one of my friends mouths today was chink. Then, the more I listened the more of the derogatory words I started hearing. I didn't think Diefenbaker really had a problem - by words like "gay" and variations of "retard" are too common. It really sucks to hear, I find it relatively depressing. I was able to get together with my school group today (minus Sophie - rugby meeting, and Neil - just not there) and that was great. I missed hanging out with those guys. I missed hanging out with mature people who understood all the reasons why we shouldn't be using language like that.
13 April 2008
Hammer Goin' Down - The Road Hammers
I don't really know what to say. This song has always had special meanings to me... and right now when ever I hear it - this one girl keeps coming to mind. The lyrics are bellow... see if you can make sense of what I mean.
"The sun's going down on me, thoughts of her keep hauntin' me.
Desperation's takin hold.
My hands are on the stearin wheel but my heart's back in Louisville.
At the far end of a thousand miles of road.
My mind's grindin like a steel gear baby, I've got to cover some ground.
She'd know how hard and fast I'm fallin for her.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin down.
Now I ain't gonna waste my time talking on some pay phone line.
Words don't get the message through.
If this rig will hold out one more day she'll hear me 40 miles away.
Tearin this four lane half in two.
My mind's grindin like a steel gear baby , I've got to cover some ground.
She'd know how hard and fast I'm fallin for her.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin down.
Now she ain't just some truck stop queen.
Man, she's the light guiding me a thousand miles for her love.
Well I'd go a million for one kiss, I'd drive those pistons with my fist.
And do it all again if it ain't enough.
My mind's grindin like a steel gear baby , I've got to cover some ground.
She'd know how hard and fast I'm fallin for her.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin down.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin.
Of the hammer goin down.
The sun's going down on me.
My hearts back on Louisville."
"The sun's going down on me, thoughts of her keep hauntin' me.
Desperation's takin hold.
My hands are on the stearin wheel but my heart's back in Louisville.
At the far end of a thousand miles of road.
My mind's grindin like a steel gear baby, I've got to cover some ground.
She'd know how hard and fast I'm fallin for her.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin down.
Now I ain't gonna waste my time talking on some pay phone line.
Words don't get the message through.
If this rig will hold out one more day she'll hear me 40 miles away.
Tearin this four lane half in two.
My mind's grindin like a steel gear baby , I've got to cover some ground.
She'd know how hard and fast I'm fallin for her.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin down.
Now she ain't just some truck stop queen.
Man, she's the light guiding me a thousand miles for her love.
Well I'd go a million for one kiss, I'd drive those pistons with my fist.
And do it all again if it ain't enough.
My mind's grindin like a steel gear baby , I've got to cover some ground.
She'd know how hard and fast I'm fallin for her.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin down.
If she could just hear the sound, of the hammer goin.
Of the hammer goin down.
The sun's going down on me.
My hearts back on Louisville."
Reflecting on Connections
What an amazing week. I can't even begin to explain it. Words do not do it justice. I'm going to miss you so much. You're more then family to me for just that week - you'll always be family to me from now on. And out Aussie friends are in there too. You're family to me too! It was great meeting you, playing Aussie Rules football, and footie (soccer) with you. We had a chance to bond, and that was amazing. Keep your heads high, and be proud. I love you all.
I normally don't write stuff like this in the public eye - but it's so amazing so I have to put it out there. Last night I had the chance to spend some truly quality time with a girl at the camp. And that little rose bud happened to blossom into a beautiful rose.
Marissa and I didn't start off on a good note. We clashed on the football pitch - but later that evening we apologized and everything was all right. We really didn't talk much after that - but she was teasing me a bit, and we sort of started to flirt. Then last night, after my groups presentation she gave this massive hug and asked me to sit with her during campfire... so I did.
We started leaning on each other, and it went from there. I was sitting behind her, and I moved my hand closer to hers, just because it was more comfortable for me. Then, Marissa started to brush my hand. I slid mine a bit closer to to hers, and she didn't do anything. So I pulled it back, thinking she did it by accident. Lol. Then, slowly, she started to slide her hand over onto mine... and we ended up interlocking fingers, and cuddling.
This was honesly one of the BEST experiences I have ever had at a camp, and it's not because there's potential for a relationship (although, that helps). It was one of the best experiences because it was almost unconditional, and without boundries. I see it as being pure and true. If nothing comes of this, that's fine ... because she'll always be a good friend of mine.
*sigh* I'm so happy. Tehehe. Things are finally starting to work out. I'm actually happy again, and that's all that matters. Not the flirting. But the bonding. But the fact that I am me again. I can't place any value on that, because it is invaluable.
I normally don't write stuff like this in the public eye - but it's so amazing so I have to put it out there. Last night I had the chance to spend some truly quality time with a girl at the camp. And that little rose bud happened to blossom into a beautiful rose.
Marissa and I didn't start off on a good note. We clashed on the football pitch - but later that evening we apologized and everything was all right. We really didn't talk much after that - but she was teasing me a bit, and we sort of started to flirt. Then last night, after my groups presentation she gave this massive hug and asked me to sit with her during campfire... so I did.
We started leaning on each other, and it went from there. I was sitting behind her, and I moved my hand closer to hers, just because it was more comfortable for me. Then, Marissa started to brush my hand. I slid mine a bit closer to to hers, and she didn't do anything. So I pulled it back, thinking she did it by accident. Lol. Then, slowly, she started to slide her hand over onto mine... and we ended up interlocking fingers, and cuddling.
This was honesly one of the BEST experiences I have ever had at a camp, and it's not because there's potential for a relationship (although, that helps). It was one of the best experiences because it was almost unconditional, and without boundries. I see it as being pure and true. If nothing comes of this, that's fine ... because she'll always be a good friend of mine.
*sigh* I'm so happy. Tehehe. Things are finally starting to work out. I'm actually happy again, and that's all that matters. Not the flirting. But the bonding. But the fact that I am me again. I can't place any value on that, because it is invaluable.
First Post
Damn you Shaw! They're not letting me get to my webspace (which I'm paying for!), so I've ended up resorting to using this site to post my blogs.
I'm not in the least bit happy, because now I can't have a customized blog... unless I can upload my own code? Not to mention I tried posting my first entry as HTML and this site rejected every freaking tag I used, and it's really starting to agitate me.
Anyhow, I am going to start transfering the blogs that I have written in the past few days. For those of you who read this, and my Nexopia blog you'll notice that they are (for the most part) the same.
Ladies and Gentleman, start your engines - because here we go!
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